What Frenemies? Kim K And Paris Hilton Reunite

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If you were wondering why you slept a little easier last night, the first universal explanation has been offered: Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton buried the hatchet in Ibiza.

There are so many things to take from the reuniting of Kim and Paris in Spain. They two used to be tight, but Paris lipped-up and spoke out back in 2008, and Kim took offense. It would seem that the two should have been besties, considering their talent levels, their history with video cameras and penises and a general misunderstanding that they owe everything to their fathers. Unfortunately, that is a pessimistic, cynical viewpoint.

Allow us to consider the raw potential of this reunion.

When Kim and Paris were breaking up, it coincided with the American economy sliding into recession. Sure, you could trust what analysts have said about the greed of the American banking institutions, and the fact that banks were offering home loans to individuals who would never be able to afford an adjustable-rate mortgage six years down the line, causing the housing market to absolutely implode…


What if… what if… the American economical woes were universally tied to the off-spring of two successful American businessmen? Maybe these businessmen made a deal at Bohemian Grove, while rubbing shoulders with all the other exceptionally powerful oddities who still show up to that place every mid-summer, and during one summer session, Papa Kardashian and Papa Hilton placed the correlation of wealth within the American economy on the harmonious relations of their daughters?

Now, that would make this a story worth caring about.

Seriously, though, check out the reunion photos in the video below. The two look genuinely happy to be reunited. …and the economy is coming back around.


James Sheldon