10 Best Quotes From ‘Veronica Mars’

Greg Gayne / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

Deep down inside aren’t we all just marshmallows? That’s the best way to describe fans of the critically acclaimed series, Veronica Mars. While the show didn’t exactly rake in viewers, it did develop a cult following. Fans loved Veronica, the teenage private eye who was determined to solve her best friend’s murder, and were also admirers of the witty dialogue that occurs so naturally between the characters. Despite the show’s dark subject matter (rape, murder and possible incest – oh my!) the show’s creator, Rob Thomas, and his team of writers kept the viewers from delving too deeply into the seedy abyss of Neptune High by peppering the entire series with sharp humour. Here are ten examples and, if you don’t chuckle at least once, you are not a true marshmallow.

10. When Veronica Mars suggests her father Keith give Weevil a job at Mars Investigation to keep him out of prison:

Veronica: I bet you’d be pretty psyched if I found someone who could help.
Keith: Level of “psyched” would depend on the “someone.”
Veronica: Eli Navarro. Remember?
Keith: You mean Weevil? Oh, Veronica, please.
Veronica: Dad, I’m serious.
Keith: Oh, I don’t know, all those times I arrested him he never struck me as great secretary material. Didn’t he get busted for murder?
Veronica: Assault.
Keith: See, so he’s not even a very good murderer.

Michael Desmond / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

Michael Desmond / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

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9. Veronica Mars was surprisingly cynical about her mom leaving the family.

Keith: I never want you to think that your mom is the villain in all of this.
Veronica: Isn’t she?
Keith: No, it’s not that simple…
Veronica: Yeah it is. The hero is the one that stays… and the villain is the one that splits.

Greg Gayne / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

Greg Gayne / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

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8. When Veronica was trying to convince Logan to host another poker game so she can determine who stole the money from the last game.

Logan: Do you even know how to play poker?
Veronica: No, but it must be really hard if all you guys play.

© The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

© The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

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7. When Logan meets his new attorney – the fabulously funny Cliff McCormack.

Logan: So, my tax dollars at work. Where were you, getting thirds at the Crazy Girls lunch buffet?
Cliff McCormack: Actually, they discontinued the buffet. Some health code thing. Okay, my name is Cliff. I’ll be your if-you-cannot-afford-an-attorney attorney. So, what are you trying to prove?
Logan: Um…my innocence?

Source: CW

Source: CW

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6. When a random classmate asks for Veronica assistance, she’s more than happy to help – for a fee, of course!

Jackson Douglas: I hear you do detective stuff for people.
Veronica: I do favors for friends.
Jackson Douglas: I can pay.
Veronica: Sit down, friend.

© UPN / Courtesy Everett Collection

© UPN / Courtesy Everett Collection

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5. Who can forget the famous quote, which taught us what a marshmallow really is.

Wallace: That might play with the masses. But underneath that angry young women shell, there’s a slightly less angry young woman who’s just dying to bake me something. You’re a marshmallow, Veronica Mars, a twinkie.


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4. Veronica always loved her ponies, which was totally adorable.

Keith: How’s about an early peak at one of your Christmas presents?
Veronica: What about our strict Christmas-morning-only rule?
Keith: This Christmas, we make our own rules. Follow me!
Veronica: [following Keith to her bedroom] I’m so impressed you fit an entire pony into my room!


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3. Veronica’s conversations with her father about her dates were always funny.

Keith: So how was your date?
Veronica: Oh, you know. Lousy conversation, but the sex was fantastic!
Keith: That’s not funny.
Veronica: I don’t know, I’m pretty sure it was.

Greg Gayne / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

Greg Gayne / © The CW / Courtesy Everett Collection

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2. Logan’s interactions with Principal Van Clemmons were pretty entertaining.

Van Clemmons: Mr. Echoll’s, I was wondering if I could have a word?
Logan: Anthropomorphic. All yours, big guy!
Clemmons: Your father has generously offered to donate a pair of boots for a school fundraising auction.
Logan: Not the ones made for walking? God, I love those boots.

© UPN / Courtesy Everett Collection

© UPN / Courtesy Everett Collection

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1. During the pilot, we saw firsthand what a cool relationship Veronica has with her dad.

Keith: Who’s your Daddy?
Veronica: Ugh, I hate it when you say that.
Keith: You know what, this is important. You remember this: I used to be cool.
Veronica: When?
Keith: ‘77. Trans Am, Blue Oyster Cult in the eight-track, a foxy, stacked blonde riding shotgun, racing for pink slips. Ah, wait a minute, I’m thinking of a Springsteen song. Scratch everything, I was never cool.
Veronica: I don’t know which bothers me more, “foxy” or “stacked.”
Keith: I nailed our bail jumper 100 yards from Mexico. Twenty-five hundred bucks. No sack dinners tonight. Tonight, we eat like the lower-middle class to which we aspire! Fire up the hibachi!

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