Harry Styles Calls Kendall Jenner Boring!

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When Harry Styles speaks, you know it’s time to listen… intently.

The handsome-and-harry Harry dished a little dirt on the dissipation of his relationship with Kendall Jenner. Allegedly, Kendall is boring. This could mean a number of things, as Harry didn’t elaborate. He did go on to suggest that he’d prefer to date British girls, and who can blame him? It’s historically proven that the Brits are not boring in the least. Especially when it comes to food.

(One moment, please, my eyes got stuck as they were rolling back in my head.)

This apparent split, and the subsequent diss may come as a surprise to Kardashian apologists. After all, it was reported yesterday that Styles was bonding with Kendall’s father, Bruce, over a game of golf. Maybe the bonding session was all the British pop-star needed to realize, “I have to get as far away from here as possible!”

It is a little sad for Kendall. She seemed like the one member of the K-Crew who might be rescued from the puppetry and pimping of her mother, to pursue a path of achievement and resistance like her once great father. But then, who am I kidding? Someone cutting their own path after everything has been handed to them? I should be slapped for even having such a thought.

In reality, it seems poor Kendall never stood a chance growing up in that three ring circus she calls a family–with all of its conditional love and drive for excess. Or maybe–just maybe–Kendall has enough self-respect to deny Harry the goods just because he’s in a boy band? How refreshing would that be?

Well, this is just perfect. Now I’m going to be thinking about the ethical resonance of this breakup all day long.

Wanna hear exactly what Harry had to say? Check out the video!

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James Sheldon

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